Bob and his wife, Mary, were living on a farm up in the hills.
One day, Bob found that the hole under the outhouse was full. He tells Mary that he doesn’t know what to do to empty the hole.
Mary says, “Why don’t you go ask Joe down the road?”
So, Bob goes down to Joe’s house and asks him, “My outhouse hole is full, and I don’t know what to do to empty it.”
Joe tells him, “Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time. The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it’s in the air, the second one will then go off and spread the shit all across your farm, fertilizing your ground. The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.”
Bob thanks him, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.
He goes home and puts them under the outhouse. He then lights them and runs behind a tree.
All of a sudden, Mary comes running out of the house and into the outhouse! Off goes the first stick of dynamite, shooting the outhouse into the air.
BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite, spreading shit all over the farm.
WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole.
Bob races to the outhouse, throws open the door, and asks, “Mary, are you all right?”
As she pulls herself up, she says, “Yeah, but I’m sure glad I didn’t fart in the kitchen.”
